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Post by rose5mcdonaghtce on Feb 23, 2010 14:23:55 GMT
Hi Johnny,
How in God's name did you manage to swallow the bullet in the first place, thought you were only supposed to bite it.
Rose.
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Post by maryfarrell6 on Feb 23, 2010 14:45:45 GMT
Hi Rose and Johnny, Was wondering exactly the same thing but was afraid to ask, Just wondering Johnny if you had farted and it flew out would you now be called Rick o Shea? Regards MaryF
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Post by rose5mcdonaghtce on Feb 23, 2010 16:52:34 GMT
Hi Mary,
40 out of ten for that as my hubby's grannie used to say.
You are on the ball today.
Rose.
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Post by andybrennan on Feb 23, 2010 18:12:56 GMT
Rose Mary F
if it had went off in the jacks Johnny would have been known maybe as broken jacks mountain??.
Andy
Where did he get a live one to swallow in the first place was he trying to hide the evidence
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Post by johnnykelly on Feb 23, 2010 18:58:17 GMT
Hi all, Ref the Bullet. The story goes like this,(true story) As a gang of us were rambling around the Revolver Range one afternoon not long after the Army had finished shooting practices, we were collecting Lead from the butts to make lead weights for the end of soldiers boots (see Army threads) I found a live round on the ground and put it in my pocket, and carried on with yhe lads, after a while we were messing up around the coal yard when I SPOTTED my Mother running towards us very excited, so I hid the bullet in my gob, and as my Mother asked me had i a bullet one of the lads behind me pushed me very hard into the back saying here he is Mrs Kelly and on that shove I SWALLOWED THE BULLET, then the nightmare began, You should have seen the Xrays, imagine being barred from games of cowboys in case you shot someone, it took over a week to clear after more doses of castor oil, to this day there is probably up the Plots somewhere a live bullet, finder please dont put it into your mouth, so i end with this,here i stand broken hearted took much castor oil and only farted. THE KELLY ON THE TELLY JOHNNY.
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Post by johnnykelly on Feb 23, 2010 19:09:48 GMT
Hi Andy I agree with you heart and soul everyone should carry a donar card as the life you savecould be close to you, and remember you cant bring them with you whats the point, I and a few of the lads when on o/seas service were asked to give blood to a baby whom had Lukemia and needed transfusions to stay alive and we always kept in touch, and I was at His wedding as a guest and we still keep in contact whenever we go to Cyprus,
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Post by andybrennan on Feb 23, 2010 19:45:01 GMT
Johnny
A nice story of the blood donation,
Andy
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Post by maryfarrell6 on Feb 23, 2010 20:18:13 GMT
Hi Johnny, Boy oh Boy Johnny you have lead a charmed life, Babes lost in the Woods followed by swallowing the bullet which could have backfired and had disasterous consequences so its obvoius someone up there was looking down on you. you diced with death twice and survived. I can't think of a better way to repay those debts or say thank you than what you did in Cyprus. You gave that boy back his life and the rewards of seeing him live a full and happy life must be an amazing feeling. Any other near misses you want to share with the rest of us because I'm sure Kelly on the Telly with the Shelly in his Belly's misadventures didn't end there. We want to hear more Bye For Now MaryF
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Post by andybrennan on Feb 23, 2010 21:25:14 GMT
Begob and Begorra MaryF
I have to say Johnny brings out your poetic side
andy
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Post by annemcnamara on Feb 23, 2010 21:35:13 GMT
Hi Mary F, Without doubt there's a poet lost in you the lads better watch out with this new found wit coming through, very good ;D Cheers Anne.
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Post by johnnykelly on Feb 23, 2010 21:35:21 GMT
How to loose a new Wellie. Hi Mary I feel like a shanaci or Jimmy oDea, On the way home from school we (the usual suspects) decided to go looking for birds nests in the plantations along the Brownstown Road,and the plantations and hedgerows along the fence of the Sewarage Farm and all of a sudden we heard the wonderful sound of the Corncrake in the long grass, and low and behold we decided to investigate(curiousity killed the cat) when some of lads came across some boxes in marshy ground so we began to pull one of the boxes out of the ground when the box broke open and out spilled a load of :BULLETS: THEN CAME A SHOUT MORE THERES MORE over here, and I ran like the clappers and as I was pullingout a box I began to sink and could not get myself out of wHAT APPARANTLY WAS A SWAMP and down I was going like the Titanic (no singing) and things were getting desperate and some of the lads were laughing their heads off, taers of fear were now evident and screams of Help were coming from my quivering lips and down I was going the lads were scared stiff do nact and then Dinger Dwyer(Dermot) ran into the swamp and pulled me out and both my new wellies were stuck in the muck and low and behold dinger ran back in and pulled out one wellie, and the other went down out of sight , we went home as fast as we could and told our parents what we found, well we were going all night up and down in the PAs car to the Digger/ Glasshouse,Priests house Scool masters house, and back and forth all evening and late into the night,every where we went we got a kick up the backside, it turned out that the boxes were dumped by A rmy personell coming back from the RANGES but no one was ever found for dumping the ammunition,but it cost me a wellie a sore arse thick ear, Feck that Corncrake::ouch#TRUE STORY#
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Post by maryfarrell6 on Feb 23, 2010 22:21:56 GMT
You see Johnny I knew there were more stories,so why don't you share them with the rest of the forum. We would love to see your adventures take care MaryF
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Post by kathyo on Feb 24, 2010 16:54:41 GMT
hi johney thank you for shareing the stories i had a great laugh kathyo
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Post by johnnykelly on Feb 24, 2010 18:37:36 GMT
Re: YOU CANT TAKE IT WITH YOU!!! TRUE BUT HAIRY SCARY AT THE TIME. How I learnt to swim, Onone of our many trips to the Liffey in Athgarvan during a fine summer that we were having 0ne of the older lads was trying to teach me how to swim, which I seemed to master no problem after swallowing half the Liffey,we were out on the bank and one of the older lads decided that anyone who could not swim was not allowed to go with the gang the next day to Blackers/ Butchers island, so we were to get back into the water for a swim test, horlicks to that I said my togs and towel were wet I am not getting back in I can nearly swim, so on that I was grabbed stripped naked and flung into the water and told dont come out until you can swim across and back non stop, mean time a gang of the girls from Pearse arrived onto the strand and set up for their picnic and there was I BOLLOCK NACKED, my clothes beside where the women were sitting, so I had no choise but stay in the water and practice up and down the river, lucky that area was not too deep and after about an hour a sun shower of rain fell out of the sky and the women scattered up to the Mill, and I was able to get out and get at my clothes, so that is how I learnt how to swim, and go on to be one of the Curraghs finest at swimming, which was to stand to me in earnest years later on another trip to the Liffey with a group of lads , SCEIL EILE AMARACH, Johnny Kelly
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Post by johnnykelly on Feb 25, 2010 20:20:21 GMT
REF YOU CANT TAKE IT WITH YOU!!! Dont forget what day tomorrow is. Its POETS DAY of course? Questions of sport 26 Years spent in Prison and on his relase the 1st question Nelson Mandella asked the assembled was did Man Utd win the Leauge yet. How to keep Liverpool in EUORPE? Put them into the Euro Star train send them on their way and then SEAL the Channel tunnel. Johnny Kelly.
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